The "Don't Kid A Kidder" Edition

Oct 01, 2023

Dear Readers,

After a heckuva rain-soaked 36 hours here in NYC, I’m dried off and psyched for the cool crisp autumn yet to come. My game plan was to stay on the 19th floor for the duration and it worked. I am now fully fall-focused: my maelstrom-induced homebound two days enabled me to get a ton of work done, work out, get my upcoming travel under control, watch two eps of Meryl Streep in the new season of Only Murders In The Building, and finish Curtis Sittenfeld’s Romantic Comedy, which you should read. Okay I actually finished that book before the rain came, but it sounded good.

In other news, we are restocking the fridge and freezer for the cooler weather, now that beach season is winding down. East Village Meat Market is my second favorite butcher in the world. It’s been there for about as long as I can remember and about 20 years before that. It’s busy every day, but on Saturdays— like yesterday when I finally ventured out as the sun started to come out— it is literally packed with people buying every kind of meat, sausages, deli meats I have never heard the names of, cheeses, dairy products, you name it. With a lack of judgment I can only wish were a rarity, I set out for the shop hungry. Very hungry.

I discovered a recent innovation— a full up prepared foods section. From pierogi to blintzes to meatballs, potatoes, salads (well by salad I mean various forms of pickled cabbage), and soups. Except there’s no room behind the counter for any of this, so they set this up these chafing dishes and serving platters on several folding tables in the middle of the shop right in front of the store-length, ceiling-high racks of canned, jarred, and non-perishable grocery items. I tried not to upend the borscht tureen as I navigated to get my mustard, pickles, cabbage salad, cookies, and other grocery items.

Then I got started at the butcher counter. Remember— I was hungry. Very hungry. Of course I got the three kinds of sausage they cure right in the shop and are famous for:

Also a whole fresh chicken, eigth-ed for me right there by the gentleman on the left, plus we had a conversation about whether or not I wanted the back and neck for soup; which of course I did. Which, in my experience, endears you to butchers. And this case was no different. Most of the workers and many of the patrons do not speak English, so I was lucky. We really started chatting about all of the meat. We went deep. In unbelievably heavily accented Ukranian.

I had several questions and, though a man of few words, he had multiple answers per question. I think he was just really excited that I was so excited to be there. Plus I was really studious about the ordering. He praised me for noticing a particular piece of skirt steak kind of hidden in the display case. He took it out and lovingly trimmed it for me, unasked, which he later intimated he doesn’t do as painstakingly for everyone. I never thought VIP access would be so thrilling!

Finally, he pointed me toward a piece of filet that he was very excited about. A special piece from a special friend at the meat market, he said! He also said “it’s pricey, but if you cook it right it will pay you back as you eat it.” Mysterious, but who could resist? I toted away my overloaded totes for the price of what it costs for a couple of mediocre steaks at any of the fanciest butchers or gourmet shops in the city. And it’s a million times as good quality.

As I mentioned, this is my *second favorite* butcher in the world. If I am now a VIP in the East Village, I am literal royalty in Islip. To the father / son team of Pete & Pete, I will always be your most loyal royal in history. They— and the meat, and the service, and the prices, are truly extraordinary at the Islip Meat Market.

I will have to leave that story for another day. But now that I am waxing insane about my butchers, I notice a certain type of non-ironic similarities.

Well, Wes Anderson, all set designers and photographers, take note!

I’m off to enjoy our stuffed cabbage!

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Happy October!